This is how I stunt my growth.
Complacency and ignorance,
Sloth is what runs through my veins,
Worrying so heavily
over
What weighs so little,
Accepting things;
How change won’t come cynicism
rocks my brain
My brain,
Creates some thoughts, devours things,
has nothing to be shown or seen,
Appreciate close to enough, but missing:
The subtleties,
The spread of love,
Threat of disease,
Desperately not wanting to share sickness with who’s kissing me,
The sun rises, I sleep through (“Tomorrow will come, I don’t need proof.”
books hidden in the library,
How all my friends are really doing,
and the decent state of my well-being.
Sweeping declarations I’ve made but never followed through,
But there are some ways that I can grow.
Being suspicious of most everything,
Hungry, tired,
Eat and
Sleep,
Quick fixes that can hold water,
Watching long before I see,
Knowing all that’s popular isn’t meant to be,
Self-deprecating,
but with undertones of confidence,
Not fighting the water – letting it flow,
Choosing all my words deliberately,
and expecting close to nothing.

 

We’re nearing where the water breaks.
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